Mourning
by GetOutOfMyHead
Summary: FICLET: I cried really hard at the end of the HBP, and this made me feel better. Takes place in October, What should be the new school year. R&R please!
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own, so don't sue me. I'm just so sad right now … it made me feel a little better.**

**DO NOT READ IF YOU HAVEN'T READ THE HALF-BLOOD PRINCE!**

"_We'll be there, Harry."_

"_What?"_

"_At your aunt and uncle's house. And then we'll go with you, wherever you're going."_

"_No-"_

"_You said that to us once before, that there was time to turn back if we wanted to. We've had time haven't we?'_

"_We're with you whatever happens …"_

_-Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, p 607_

Whatever happens. A lot had happened. And they'd been true to their word, staying with him, moving, tracking and searching. There was nothing for any of them but for the search. Even those signs of caring between Ron and Hermione had disappeared. They'd put their own futures, their lives, on the backburner for him. He was grateful. More than that. More than could ever be expressed. But he'd left them for tonight; tonight it was all for him - all his doing - all his revenge.

When he'd left 12 Grimmauld Place Hermione had been asleep at her desk, scrolls and old records wrinkling under her cheek. Ron had been in a comfy armchair by the fireplace, a large tome fallen open on the floor in front of him, head lolling on his own shoulder. And he'd left them there. They deserved the night's sleep. How long had it been since they had slept properly?

Harry sighed and stepped closer to the dirty river. One more minute, and then he could continue. The contact was waiting. He had to. He owed Harry, much more than this simple task, and he would do it.

Harry felt a slight vibration from his watch. Time. He pulled the Invisibility Cloak a little tighter and turned from the filthy rushing water, turned toward his mission for tonight. Maybe he'd sleep better when it was over. When he knew that he had done all he could. Righted as much as possible with a single, simple act.

Spinner's End happened to be just as dilapidated and crumby as the rest of the streets Harry had to walk through. A giant mill chimney hovered over the dark scene forebodingly. There were no shadows - all the streetlights had been broken. There were no noises - the night was windless. There was no movement - the town's inhabitants were too frightened to wander. Everything was still. The only sign of life at all was the faint, flickering light in the downstairs window of the last house of Spinner's End. Harry walked quickly and stealthily towards it.

The door opened without him even knocking. He removed the sky blue cloak as the door closed behind him.

"He's in the sitting room," whispered a voice behind him. Harry turned and stared hard at the small rat-faced man.

"He has no idea, Pettigrew?" he whispered coldly.

"None, Harry."

"Potter," he corrected venomously, handing the invisibility cloak to him. "Go. Hide. Maybe if you're lucky another family will take you in as a pet for their son. God forbid," he added, sneering slightly.

Pettigrew bowed and wrapped the cloak around himself. The door opened silently, but before it closed, he whispered to Harry, "He's not right. He hasn't been in months." The door shut and he was gone, hopefully for good. Or at least until the next time Harry saw him. Pettigrew's crimes could not be forgiven nor forgotten. But the punishment could be postponed.

The door to the sitting room was closed. Harry stood outside it and took a deep breath. Remus would confront him in the morning for not taking backup with him this night, but it didn't matter. This was something he had to do.

The door creaked slightly as he pushed it open. The room was cool, the fire in the hearth burning low. The target sat in a chair facing the fire. From the angle Harry could see a large book lying open in his lap, but his eyes stared stoically in to the flames. He didn't move as Harry closed the door quickly behind him and swept the room with his eyes, his wand never leaving the sitting man.

"There you are, Wormtail," he said quietly. "Get another bottle of wine out of the cellar. This one is almost empty."

"You've no need for it, Snape" Harry answered just as quietly, his voice still conveying all the loathing he felt for this man. This man who had lead Voldemort to his parents. This man who had killed Albus Dumbledore.

A full minute passed without sound or movement from either party. Finally, slowly, Snape turned enough in his chair to regard Harry's wand. Black eyes met green, niether showing surprise. "I thought you'd be here sooner," Snape said simply. He nodded. "Called up dear old Wormtail, I suppose? Called in your debt?"

"Partly. He owes me a lot more than admittance to your crap shack."

"Crap shack," Snape repeated. "Such a suiting name." He sat back in the chair, studying Harry. "What are you waiting for, Potter? And invitation to do me in?"

"You know I can't," Harry said, "Not until I know why you killed Dumbledore."

"Eat at you, will it?" Snape sighed again and returned his gaze to the glowing embers. He didn't speak for a long moment. "Do you know what an Unbreakable Vow is, Potter? It is a promise that will kill you if you leave it unfulfilled. I made one to Draco's mother last summer, to keep watch and guide Draco in his mission, to help him to the best of my ability, to complete the task if he is unable to. As you well know, the mission was to kill Dumbledore, thus ridding the Dark Lord of his greatest enemy. He does not think very highly of you, Potter." Snape shifted again in his chair, looking back at Harry. "In order to live, I had to kill the Headmaster. I had thought that even if he was gone I would still be able to send information to the Order. Well. We see how appreciated the information has been."

"The Order?" Harry spat. "Why keep up the pretence of working for the Order when we all know you're a Death Eater? Always was and always will be our enemy?"

No emotion was expressed in Snape's face. "I was a Death Eater," he stated bluntly. "I however, like few others, realised the horrors I would be expected to do too late. You know that I am the one who reported the prophesy to the Dark Lord?"

Harry's hand tightened on his wand handle. "Yeah. Trelawney told me."

Snape nodded. "That was the last mission I ever did willingly for the Dark Lord. He had asked me to follow Albus should he leave Hogwarts. I was promised great rewards, riches, prizes and women. Anything I asked for. I gave him the information, proud of myself." He spat the last part out angrily. A look of disgust passed his features. "I was happy with the arrangement, pleased with the praise and position, with the gifts and gold. And then I was asked to - " He stopped, took a breath, blinked several times. "I was given a new assignment. I can't even begin … I would have never - I mean it was so … so …" Snape's eyes glazed over slightly as he watched an event take place inside his mind. After a moment he said, "The rewards did not outweigh the action. I've always regretted falling prey to his promises. To his lies.

"It was the mission that made me again go to Albus. I begged him to help me, to get me out. I admitted that my first confession had been less than honest. This time he questioned me with Vertiserum. When he was satisfied I was being true, he told me there was nothing he could do to get me out. Even though I already worked there, at the school, he could not help me further. But he could help me after it was over, if I did this one thing for him. If I spied for him. So I joined the Order, begrudgingly of course. It was filled with people I hated and whom loathed me in return." He raised his hands to his eyes and rubbed them as though exhausted. "And then the Dark Lord attacked your home."

Harry stiffened. "I bet you felt just horrible about James Potter's death," he sneered.

Snape looked him in the eye. "I will not lie, Potter. I was never overly upset by his death." Harry's hand shook visually with barely suppressed rage. "I was however," Snape continued quickly, "somewhat saddened by your mother's death. She was too kind for her own good. But what affected me most was the fact that I had condemned a child to a life without his parents, to be raised by abusive relatives. Like mine. And many years later, only two years ago in fact, I regretted not being so highly valued that I could have known who was the Order's traitor. Peter Pettigrew. It still amazes me that he could possibly have made it so high in the Dark Lord's circle."

"Yeah, yeah, Peter was a shock, I've heard that before."

"But not from me."

They stared in silence at each other. Finally Harry said, "You want someone to believe you? That you really worked with us?" Snape simply looked at him, waiting. "Tell me what you know about the Horcruxes. Voldemort's Horcruxes."

Snape said, "You, Potter, of all people would not believe anything I would tell you."

"We know enough about them that I can tell if you're lying or not."

"I expect this will change nothing then. You came here for a specific purpose."

"No. Nothing will change."

"Good," Snape said with the air of a man about to be relived of a great burden. "Life is too good a punishment for me. Perhaps something in the afterlife will be arranged. Something appropriate. If you'll look in the urn in the cupboard, Potter, you'll find something that may interest you."

Keeping his wand trained on Snape, Harry walked cautiously to the cupboard. He never took his eyes off his prey as he pulled out the urn and tipped it over onto the desk beside it. Inside was a leather case for reading glasses. On the top of it was the Ravenclaw eagle engraved in gold with their motto beneath it. With his thumb he opened the case and saw the glasses sitting on a soft silk blue cloth.

"Do not touch it. You cannot touch any of them. That is what happened to Albus' hand."

"Do you know were the others are?" Harry asked, closing the case and pocketing it.

"Mostly. Riddles diary was one, but you destroyed it. Albus destroyed Gaunts' ring. Slytherin's locket is another, then Hufflepuff's goblet, and Ravenclaw's reading glasses. The other pieces are in the snake he always has with him and he himself. There are - were seven."

Harry nodded. "Those are the ones Dumbledore and I thought he may have picked. Do you know where the others are? The ones that haven't been destroyed?"

"The snake is always with the Dark Lord. The goblet is hidden in Borgin and Burkes. You have the glasses now." He rubbed his face again.

"Do you know who took Slytherin's locket?" Snape nodded but didn't speak. "Who? Did they manage to destroy it?"

"No. He wasn't strong enough," Snape murmured.

"Who is R.A.B?" Harry demanded urgently. He had just got a sense of someone approaching the dirty river, breaking through the alert-wards he'd set up.

"Regulus Ambrose Black. We took the locket together, but the spells on it were too strong for us to break." He reached into his robes, pulled out a small black velvet box and held it out to Harry. " I believe that you have, or soon will have, all the object Horcruxes. The last two will most likely have to be taken out in the same battle. The snake and himself."

Harry opened the box and stared at the golden locket. The one Dumbledore had died needlessly for. The stylized 'S' glinted in the dieing firelight. He snapped the box closed and pocketed it as well. "Anything else?" he demanded.

Snape met his eyes sadly. "There is a sealed letter in my desk drawer. I wrote it to the Dark Lord long ago, but I still hold fast to what I had to say then. Also in there is my Gringotts vault key. I want the money to go to the Order."

"Done." Harry watched warily as Snape stood and faced him.

"Goodbye Potter."

"Goodbye … Professor."

Once Harry's eyes adjusted to the gloom after the bright green light, he went over to the desk. As Snape had requested he took the key and pulled out the letter. He set it in the chair beside his former teachers crumpled body and took another from his own pocket. A dark smile crossed him face. They now knew where the last object was, the goblet. They would set out for it tomorrow. Soon, he would be ready.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

There was a rather large panic taking place at the hidden headquarters called Grimmauld Place. Harry had disappeared during the night without a word or note. In the dining room Remus Lupin, Hermione Granger, Ron, Fred, George, and Ginny Weasley all sat around the table trying to figure out where he could have gone. Tonks had just left to the Ministry to see Shacklebolt and Mrs Weasley was compulsively frying eggs, bacon and sausage in the kitchen, worry and stress exaggerating the crows feet at her eyes. Mr Weasley had yet to get home from work - these days he practically lived at the office, only coming home for naps and the occasional meal.

"What about Hogwarts?" Ginny suggested. "He hid Snape's old book there. Maybe he thinks there could be something useful in there to track the git down."

"No, I don't think so," Hermione said quietly. "He went through it several dozen times last year, he would remember anything important."

Remus sighed as Mrs Weasley came in with the first tray of food and plates. "He wouldn't have gone after McNightly, would he?"

"No," answered Ron. "We talked about him, Harry knows it'll take most of us to take out McNightly. The house is too warded."

"He probably just went to meet that contact he was talking about the other day," Fred said suddenly.

"Yea, that's right, he said he'd have to see the guy soon!" George added looking as if there could be no other answer.

"He has a contact? Who?" Remus asked urgently.

The twins looked surprised. "You don't know?" they asked at once.

"He never mentioned a contact to us!" Hermione said. Ron and Ginny nodded.

"Well it was more on accident we found out," said Fred.

"Though it's his own fault for talking to himself," added George. "He said sometimes you can see a link better if it's vocalised."

"He was talking about taking care of something soon, I think I heard him say Dumbledore's name."

"He was sitting in the drawing room, he had the letter he got a few days ago. He looked intense."

"Wasn't it later that day he asked us for one of our three-hour Invisibility cloaks?"

"Three-hour Invisibility cloaks?" Ginny asked.

"Yeah, they're new. The invisible charm on the only lasts around three hours. It doesn't say that on the package though-"

"Did he say what he was going to do with it?" Remus interrupted.

"No, didn't say nothing, did he Fred?"

"Nope, nothing. Wouldn't budge a bit."

Remus stood and started pacing angrily. "I can't believe he didn't tell us! I thought we were clear on-"

The door opened forcefully and Harry entered breathlessly. Everyone jumped up and converged on him, but he waved them away saying, "I know, I know, just sit and listen though."

When they finally complied he leaned his hands on the table and looked around at them. "I take it from what I just heard Fred and George told you about my contact?" Everyone started talking again and he held up a hand for silence. "I went to see him last night. He is a Death Eater, but he will be caught soon. I gave him the gag Invisibility cloak." He smirked.

"Who was it?" Remus demanded.

Harry's eyes darkened. "Pettigrew," he said.

Remus growled. "You can't trust anything that _scum _has to say, Harry, you know that!"

"He can't lie to me. I called in my wizards debt on him, he had no choice but to tell me what I wanted to know." He rubbed his face tiredly.

"And just _what _did you want to know?" Mrs Weasley demanded looking horribly pale.

Harry straitened, his expression stony. "I asked him where Snape was."

The silence echoed for several minutes. Only Hermione picked up on Harry's use of past-tense. "Where is he Harry?" she asked quietly, afraid of the answer.

He turned away from them and stated helping himself to some breakfast. "He's dead." Everyone but Hermione and Ginny was shocked as they slowly clued in to the fact that Harry had killed their former professor. After giving them another minute he sat and started eating. "He lived in a rundown muggle town. Pettigrew was staying with him on Voldemort's orders. He got me in, took the cloak and left. I talked to Snape a bit and then went through some of his things before people got there." Harry pulled a book, a glasses case and what looked like a velvet ring box out of his pocket and set them on the table. He enlarged the book to it's original size, which was quite large. "He's been keeping notes on all Death Eater activity and members. And the letters he has been sending are good. The information is right. According to this book, Dumbledore told him to do anything to stay undercover for as long as possible. That's what they were arguing about by the Forbidden Forest," he added to Hermione and Ron. They looked surprised but nodded in understanding.

"What are those, Harry?" Ginny asked, gesturing to the other objects.

Harry smiled. "Rowanda Ravenclaw's reading glasses and Salazar Slytherin's locket," he said smugly. "Snape had them. Apparently he and Sirius' brother took the locket and tried to destroy it for the light. Before Regulus was murdered. They couldn't so he just kept it. Voldemort gave him the glasses to keep safe just a little while ago. I've read most of the book," he added.

"Did he tell you what and where the last Horcruxes are?" Ron asked.

"Yeah," Harry answered thru a mouthful of bacon. "The last object is Helga Hufflepuff's goblet, which is hidden in Borgin and Burkes. We have to get it as soon as possible. I'll destroy them all in one go, and then we can plan for the battle."

"We're still missing two though," Ginny said, confused.

Harry shook his head. "The snake, Nagini, and Voldemort are the last two pieces. They'll have to be taken out in the battle." He pushed his empty plate away. "I have to get some sleep," he said picking up the glasses and locket. "I'll put these away. When we're ready to go get the goblet , wake me up."

He stood and left quickly, eyes still averted from his friends. As the door closed Remus took the large book and started shifting through the hundreds of pages filled with Snape's neat scrawl. Scattered here and there between the entries of information were letters, letters to Snape's family, to Dumbledore, to Voldemort. Everything was neatly dated and tidy. There were no scratched out words, no hesitation in the sentences. In the second part, the second war, the writing had changed slightly. Snape had written out Harry's story of how Voldemort had been resurrected and his take on the potion Wormtail had used. His extensive examination of the ancient magic left Remus' head spinning, but still he continued to skim through. Finally he came to the part that he was looking for. An entry that looked more like a page from a journal or diary - the entry about Dumbledore's request.

… _He said if it should come to it, I would be the one to kill him. Kill him! I told him I would not, and that if 'it' should come to anything, we would deal with it accordingly at the time. Of course then he had to remind me about my promise. Both of them, actually. The one I made to him so many years ago, to follow and obey him, and the one to Narcissa, to help Draco and complete his mission myself if need be. He pointed out the convenience of the two possibly correlating. The nerve of that man._

_I cannot believe he would ask that of me. After all these years, and all that I owe him, he would make me promise this. Promise to kill him …_

_-+-_

In the drawing room two floors up, Ginny sat alone, letting silent tears flow freely. She couldn't believe what had happened. Harry, her Harry, had killed someone. Not just someone, oh no, but Professor Snape! He had gone and killed him in his own house. Since he had told her the prophecy she hadn't been sure that her gentle Harry could take a life, even Voldemort's. And now he had. Sure he had gotten plenty of information if the look on Remus' face was anything to go by, but at what cost to him? How was this really effecting Harry? He'd come back and eaten as if nothing had happened, told them everything without hesitation, but what was really happening in his mind? Well, whatever it was, she vowed, she would help him.

-+-

Three hours had passed since the Order of the Phoenix had entered Borgin and Burkes. Harry was still searching the basement - for the fourth time. He flat out refused to believe that Snape could have lied about the goblets whereabouts. Remus had found no mention of the goblet in skimming the book, nothing about anything at all that might be hidden in Diagon Alley. Tonks and Shacklebolt stood by the door, talking quietly. They would have to leave soon; Remus was pretty sure they would have to force Harry out of the dirty little shop.

Suddenly Harry came barrelling up the rickety staircase, yelling for him. "Remus! I found it! I found it!"

Everyone turned to the boy as he burst into the room. Remus quickly went to him. "Good show, Harry! Are you sure this is it though?"

"Yeah," Harry said triumphantly. "Look!" He opened the stained wooden box and tilted it towards Remus. There was the glittering silver goblet with the Hufflepuff badger proudly posing on one side.

"I told you it was here," Harry said. "Told you. He didn't lie."


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three**

What do you want from me? Why won't you leave me alone?

_I want a strait answer._

Well ask, damnit! Don't just sit there and mock me!

_Sit?_

You know what I mean, you son of a bitch!

_Of course I do. But you deserve it._

No I don't.

_You do. You can't even give me a strait answer._

Maybe if you shut the hell up and let me think-

_I have. Remember? You never answered. You can't be trusted to figure it out yourself._

Oh yeah, you gave me, what, a couple hours? How the hell am I supposed to figure out what you want to know that fast, huh?

_Yet you can respond with cheek and attitude instantly. Fascinating. Now answer me. Why?_

He deserved it!

_Why?_

He killed Dumbledore! He deserved it!

_Had you met in battle he would have deserved it. You didn't. You killed him in cold blood. Murderer._

I'm not a murderer! He is! How many people has he killed over the years? He killed Dumbledore! It's his fault that my parents are dead, isn't it? There is - was - NOTHING good or decent about that man.

_Who are you trying to convince?_

You, you sick son of a bitch!

_Well now, that's not nice to say about poor old Lily, is it? After all, she did die for you, so that would make her the exact opposite of a bitch._

SHUT UP! GO AWAY!

_I'll leave when you let me. Now. Answer me. Why?_

I told you! He had to die! He deserved it!

_Because he killed Dumbledore. I heard you. But you read the book. You read Snape's own words when he got the order and when he carried it out. He didn't act of his own accord. He was working on orders. He could have helped immensely now._

I didn't know! I didn't know!

_Everyone has 20/20 hindsight vision. Efficient._

Gods, just go! Go away! Leave me alone. I did what had to be done.

_Wasn't it an old Star Trek movie that said "Revenge is a dish best served cold"? How was it? Cold enough for you?_

Please just go. I can't think about this now. I have to focus.

_On what? Killing again? Learning some nice new curses from Snape now aren't you? Now he's dead? Funny how you never learned from him when he was alive._

Oh Gods…

_Gods? _God _has nothing to do with it. _

"Harry!"

Why are you doing this?

"Harry! Come on!"

_The better question would be 'Why am I doing this?' You think we're separate? We're not. We are one. Where you go, I come along. At least you'll never be alone._

"Harry! Breakfast is ready. Hurry and get up or Fred and George will eat it all."

_Yes Harry. Hurry up. Can't you feel our stomach rumbling? I sure can._

"I'm up, Ron, I'm awake. Grab me a seat will you?"

_That's right. Go play your games, Harry._


End file.
